Yes, I am serious, and stop calling me Shirley..... I am a raging goofball. It is hard for me to be at all serious in my daily life. I am sarcastic, silly, and inappropriate. And this quality unfortunately carries through in my parenting of my two daughters. This is quickly proving to bite me in the ass on a daily basis.
I am now a parent and as I stand in my Mommy shoes, I recall times when dad would get SO irritated at me and my brother. We were just being giggly kids, laughing at stupid shit that seemed so hilarious we could laugh till we drooled. My dad was goofy, funny, and not very serious when I was a kid. (Except when he found a pile of empty Boone's Farm and Sun Country Wine Cooler bottles near the wood pile when I was 18..) He used to turn dinner into a "three ring circus", as my mom called it. It drove her damn near crazy. But I LOVE that my dad was so silly and funny all the time. I learned my sense of humor from him. I recall a time when we were camping. My brother, Andy, and I were on this rant saying "Tootie" in reference to a character on that douche-bag show, The Facts of Life. We just kept repeating it over and over and over. Finally my dad snapped, "It's JUST not funny anymore!!! Knock it off!!" We shut up, stunned by his volume. I have a loud voice but man, my dad could BELLOW when he was pissed. As we sat in stunned silence in our pop-up camper, we heard my dad utter softly, "Tootie!" After cooling off he clearly recognized the hilarity in that one little word.
So last night we were driving with the kids in the car. We went to a Japanese restaurant and the kids ate dutifully, Sophie with her teriyaki chicken and Isabella with her salmon and a few pieces of sushi. As we lengthened the evening with a couple of errands, the girls went into a fit of bugging each other and giggling. Poking, touching, tickling, stealing toys, and squealing like baby pigs. My migraine soon erupted and made Mommy mega-irritable. Then the spazzed-out laughter began. Don't even know what it was about, it just was annoying as all holy hell. And every time we told them to quiet down/knock it off/shut their pie-holes it just got worse. I glared at Sophie and she was drooling, her eyes were watering and rolling back into her head. She is a very special child. What in the hell was so God damn funny?! Then it struck me. I have switched roles with my dad. The exact same shit that I found hilarious enough to make me piss myself was making my own daughters do the same (nearly). If my head hadn't been pounding I probably would have cracked a smile.
The giggles and squealing with silliness continued after we got home. I yelled, I threatened, I lost it. Every time I threatened punishment for a day, week, etc. it was clear I would not be taken seriously. Damn it. This is what I get for being the funny mom. Every thing I say is a big, fat joke. I really tout how cool it is to have a fun mom. I think life would be boring if my kids didn't have a mom who teased them, was sarcastic, and made things silly whenever I could to lighten the mood. And having two dramatic daughters who are not even in the pre-teen years yet, trust me when I say the mood needs to be lightened a LOT.
I will continue to be crazy and silly with my children. It's just in my blood, I can't help it. But if I need a stern word or two and my husband's out of town, can one of you come over to my house? My kids aren't buying my schpiel when they know I've got two Whoopee Cushions stashed on the shelf for mornings when they need a farty wake-up.
No comments:
Post a Comment